Stars on the dark sky

They fall.
It is fall.
It is August.

New moon.
Letting go's and saying hello's.

Today I met again with the guy who was on the plain to Mexico, 2 years ago. Then he was in the Mexican rainbow. And then in the horse caravan. And now he is in here. Staying for some days after the Finland Rainbow.

Looking and feeling him and the surrounding hostel Euphoria (filled with rainbowers and hippies and everybody), I remembered how we lived in Mexico and maybe a bit like it in Canada too. And how now my life feels so different. I have connection with this way of living too and it has and is part of my growth and life. At the same time I am happy to have the choice and freedom to live in another way.

Walking home on the lonely streets of Tallinn. Warm night.
This is so right,
hands moving with the flow.
Something grows and something goes.
Light shines through.



*

In Estonia I have met with some days without electricity and all what comes with it and it has gave me pretty strong feelings about what might happen when some systems fail. My choice is to go to countryside, to grow my own food and to get a horse.
It just feels more and more real and life in the city seems like a nice game to play, but not for too long.

Old energies are falling apart and from this dust new phoenix can rise.
Everybody has to wake her/him up.


*



Roads are crossing again and I am waking up for communication and meetings.
Thank you,
that you are alive.

Be receptive

Talks with the Mother Earth

Deep breath of the air close to the chestnut tree. This tree has said to be mine. I do not own Her. I do love Her. And when I appear in Lääne-Virumaa, my parents home, I go and say hello. She appears in my thoughts sometimes even when I am physically away from Her.

On this day I gather some springflowers, white and blue, and take them with me. Forest is calling. There is an Oak-tree there, which is another good friend of mine. He has heard stories from my heart, tears and joys and silence.
I look at the evening sun through the trees, my back leaning towards the Oak.
My sight goes down and seemingly still ground appeares to be moving, growing and living! A little black spider is crawling on the leaves of the last year. She makes fast movement, but has time to stop and look around too. There is a shadow with her. And this shadow changes its shape as the spider is moving. Shadow has many shapes and some of them do not look like a spider at all! What a sun and what a spider - together they give life to another creature - the Shadow! And this one is so unpredictable and certain at the same time!

I go, towards the stone which came into my mind now. I found this stone one time, walking in the forest. It was buried under the moss. There are patterns on this stone and I hear stories of the big travel from the North from Her. She is calm and old and has some secrets with Her.
I find her, though She is under the moss again.
Without really thinking I know that those flowers I am carrying with me, are meant to put on the stone, into the concavity. I make pattern with them. 9 flowers, 5 blue and 4 white ones + 5 leaves.

My wish is to live like the Nature - following the rythm, being gentle and firm, being creative and still, being eternal and mysterious and so simple.
Everything what happens in the nature, happens with ease and joy and glory.
Human mind makes an effort to describe and understand it. Long mathematical equations and models are created in order to prove it and talk about it.
But the thing we are talking about, is so simple!
Maybe that is why we cannot crasp it - we are usually not so simple and there is not so much silence in us.... The Nature talks to us through our own voice. That is why it is hard to recognize it.

I saygoodbye and go straight to the Chestnut - I am carrying a message from the Oak and from the Stone to Her. I put my forehead against the tree and this is how the message is given. I do not know much about it, but I feel like I can be the messenger - who can walk and move and transfer.
A Birch in the middle of the garden is waiting to hear greetings too...

Mother Nature likes us to walk on Her, to touch and to admire and to get inspired. She is infinite support, peace and love.

Listen to the birds, singing their songs of joy. They love to wake up every morning - to cheer up the day, to enjoy the fresh air and the rising of the Sun. The life on Earth is as simple as that.

Loodus.
Loovus.
Loodu sees.
Loodu.
Looja.
Lugu.
Loo.

Stiil ja Vabadus

Ma muidugi oskan raha ka hästi kulutada, leida midagi, mille vastu teda vahetada. Täna tajusin kuidagi eriti selgelt, milline naljakas mäng see on. Ma annan paberit ja siis saan haaknõelad vastu. Ja see, kes raha saab, on nii õnnelik. Ja mina olen rahul, et sain haaknõelu. Kõik peaks justkui hästi olema! Miks on siis mingi kiuks sees seal kohas, kus osad asjad tunduvad liiga kallid ja siis teiselt poolt ostavad firmad turundusfirmade teenuseid, et ikagi veenda inimesi oma toodete ostmise vajaduses. Kahepoolne õnn on ju eesmärgiks?

Kas on raske anda ja on kange tahtmine saada?

Maailm on ju me endi loodud, miks siis elame näilises puuduses? Meil on see üks planeet siin elamiseks, see on ümmargune ja omamoodi lõplik, on terviksüsteem. Seega peaks olema võimalik kõigil elada tervelt ja külluslikult, puudused tulevad vaid sellest, kui me ei ole osanud ressursse hästi jaotada.
Vaene on ju mõnes kohas suisa illegaalne olla. Näiteks USAsse sisenedes või ka teistesse esimese maailma heaoluriikidesse minna soovides on piiriametnikel õigus küsida, kui palju raha on sul pangaarvel, kus sa töötad ja kuhu lähed - kõlab nagu üli-uudishimulik vanaema, kes soovib info omamise kaudu kontrollida sind, isegi kui ta ei jõua igale poole kaasa tulla, kuhu sa lähed. Vähemasti tahab ta teada, mismoodi asjad on ja ega see polegi nii oluline, et kuidas sa end tunned ja et kas on tundeselgust ja mõtteerksust... oluline on pigem see, et kas on taskus palju raha ja oled tegemas midagi prestiižset, su tegemistel on tava-loogilised seletused ja sa oled lihtsasti jälgitav - küll pangakonto toimingute ja ka näiteks postkaartide ja hotellide ja kõiksugu selliste süsteemide kaudu.

Noh, võibolla polegi see halb.
Praegu lähen minagi lennuki peale kohvriga, seljas mantel ja jalas kenad saapad. Pealtpoolt vaadates võiks arvata, et ma olen peen preili. Kui läbi lumeraja lennujaama poole astusin ja ninast tatti välja nuuskasin, niimoodi suusatajate või vanade metsameeste moodi, siis mõtlesin küll, et ei tea, kas see läheb üleüldise "stiiliga" kokku...., või et kui ema seda näeks!?

Võibolla võin ma nüüd olla vahest ka "stiilipuhas", kui ma seda tugevasti otsustan ja arvan, et tasub proovida. Sest nüüd ma taipan, et ükskõik, millist vormi ma endal ka üll kannan, ei muuda see seda, milline ma olen. Niimoodi saab ka vähem vaielda, sest enda seisukoha tõestamine polegi eriti oluline enam. See on vaikselt ja kindlalt enda sees olemas, kuulamas uusi vaatenurki, ennast sirutamas ja avardamas. Ta pole enam ohustatud. Teda pole kunagi kaitsta vaja olnudki, naljakas, et kunagi siiski see vajalik tundus...

Lendan Amsterdami. Loodan, et ma Kanadasse ei lähe, kuigi see lend sinna lõpuks välja viib. Plaanin lihtsalt varem välja astuda, sest selle ajaga, mis olen Eestis olnud, on mu elu nii palju muutunud, et praegu Kanadasse minemine ei tundu esimese hooga nii vajalik. Ainult väike igatsusvalu on seal endast märku andmast, mind hullusele kutsumas. Pass on ju kaasas ja arvuti ja hambahari. See, kas mind riiki lubataks, on muidugi omaette küsimus. Aga küllap pika lennu jooksul jõuaks ka mõne hea loo välja mõelda. Ja mu praegune "stiil" lubaks mul vast kindlamalt sinna sisse sulanduda, jätta mulje, et olen mõni Ida-Euroopa tähtis preili, karvamüts peas ja arvuti kotis.
Mõnus on niimoodi mõelda.
Tunda seda, et ma olengi vaba, otsustama just nii, kuidas sel hetkel, kui on otsustamise aeg, kõige õigem tundub.
Nii ma lähengi,
homme.
Iga minemine on omamoodi lõplik.
Iga hüvastijätt on tähtis ja samas nii lihtne. Mis siin ikka nutta.
Elu tuleb ja läheb.

Mina lehvitan sellest aastast siitmaalt ja eks siis ole näha, mis edasi saab. Kell näitas 14:14 ja 2:22.
Head ended.

Sacred Trails on the Island

Cow Bay, Flores Island, BC.

(http://www.panoramio.com/photo/12847809 - thanks for the picture, somebody!)

"We will be at your house at 5 am - so you will come?"
"Hmm....yes!"

Dylan, Emily (from Sweden), her mother Lotta and niece Anna and me, Marian - we left Victoria behind and drove up north, then west and moved on a water taxi and started a journey to an island. Flores.
Wind with me, mountains around, water from the ocean, rocks...., native reserves. And First Nation people on the boat, in the village.
Again with my backpack, weight of it... steps into the forest, to the beach, to the forest again and to the beach again. Trail lead further and further. First swim, naked and in the waves ~ fresh and free!

We got there, after 6 hours of hiking. Cow bay.
So warm was this day, like in Mexico...
And then, I had my first sight to the endless ocean. Pacific Ocean. Nothing more than ocean.
Whales there, I saw one of them for a second.

Magic around me.
I laid on a rock and it started to talk with me. About secrets. About the future. About my life.
And I listened.
An eagle flew over and I had a silence wish to find his feather.
This happened later, when I was fox-walking ~ the Feather just was there in front of my feet, when I looked down... How?! Really!?

I fell asleep, into the dreams. Then I woke up, did the exercises and went for a run, to the other side of the bay and back...then into the ocean which was painted colourful by the setting Sun... Red and everything.

Those days I spent wondering around. Dead sea lion and his smelling tooth. A man and his partner living in a hutch in the middle of this beauty and wilderness for 30 years. Solar panel and a boat.
Trail along the river, wolf and cougar tracks and then just me and Emily there, surrounded by the sacred silence, salmonberries, huckleberries and blueberries. Every step so different on the riverstones, barefoot. Holy ground. Just standing, in awe and bliss.

Another adventure to the next bay, just me ~ two grandfathers on one of the bays, with kayaks - they gave me cookies and kindness, I continued, climbed over the rocks and cliffs, worried if I can make it back cause the tide was getting higher with every moment and I didn't know the trails yet.
Abandoned hutch ~ books in German and English, kid toys, blackberry branches growing through the wooden floor. My lunch there. Boat in a bush.
I found my way back, I found the secret paths, my fear evaporated and I watched the grey ocean with growing peace in my mind. I climbed the rock to see, to feel how it is to be as far as I can, just me and black rocks, small plants and loudness of the ocean.

Oh, it is easy to feel afraid near this Ocean, with incoming tides on the unknown ground, on the beaches so untouched by human feet and minds. Wild.
And the forests are so old, oldest I have ever seen and felt. Red cedars so tall, mosses, ferns ~ all so gracefully on top of each other, sharing the space. And berries all around. Those forests are rich. It is possible to survive there, just eating the plants...
I am learning this wisdom. Dreams tell me, people come to my way to show.

Dylan caught a fish just when I got there. Snapper. And another one! Luck!
We returned to the camp on the darkness of our list night there, crab in the bag, fish hanging on the hooks, flowers and a big feather with me too. Fire was waiting there.
We went out to the rocks and I reminded my university time - how to cut the fish! It worked. Headlamps showed the light and guts and blood came out... I washed my knives, fillets and fishheads for the soup...
Feast. Garlic. Butter. Fish and crab on the fire!
Mother Earth is kind.

Life woke me up again 3 minutes before the alarm clock, like the day when I had to wake up at 4 am to get going... Trust, this is what I have been teached.
Long hike back. Treasures in my bag.
We missed one track and I took the rock-way. Lotta and Anna followed and it became an adventure. We created tracks to the untouched beaches. We had to make our way through the hard bushes..., climb over the rocks, with the heavy backpacks this time. Those things just happen with me, apparently :) They didn't complain and we made it, right on time! 15 minutes before the boat we were there.

Native Village, feels like in Mexico, close to my heart.
I will go back there. Rock told me so.

Tofino, touristic spot, holiday just now.
We went to eat out - weird, after cooking on a fire... But. In life one has to be flexible. Miso soup. Yoshi, my Japanese friend and his soup in my mind. Yes, this life is great!

So warm again, we took the road back. A lake. Memories from the childhood trips with the whole family - to the lake! Different family here now. Here and now.
Water so warm.
It is not illegal to have naked boobs here. So we did. I was to tired to worry or think and find my swimming suit... Killing is more legal than being naked. Funny world. Heh.

Setting sun and music about the rainbows. My brother, thank you for being with me. And Marco.
And all my life, my past - it is somehow with me as the future will bring us together, those of us, who have to meet again. Presence here. In this car on the road.
I felt so great,
peace and pleasure.
This land is my home today. Street names in English.
I understand and learn more each day.

Sweden is opening itself up too. I have friends to visit there now. So is the life unfolding and I keep on dreaming.


I imagined my parents here (as I saw Emily's mother here just now).... :) one day maybe.
And then I will have car to take us out,
or maybe we hitchike alltogether to take an Adventure! Just for the sake of adventure!

The World Revolution

What is happening with the world, with the People!?

I can see that people here are so afraid. They pass by in their fast cars and they even do not want to see us, because we might be dangerous.
They are ashamed that there are still some crazy kids who think that they do not have to buy a car, buy a ride, buy a life...
They do not dare to look into my eyes.

I look.
I see.
I cry.

People are not allowed to walk everywhere on the Earth anymore. Highways are so dangerous.
Fast. Faster. Faster.
And you cannot go over the river because there is only highway going over.
We saw signs which forbidded us to walk next to the roads.
We had to find places where we could stand,
and watch as cars passed by,
usually one person driving,
staring without seeing us, without having any emotions.
What is happening?
Where are you all rushing?
Don't you have children who want to see the world?
Don't you have any friends who hitchike?
Haven't you ever be in a situation where there is no other option than just standing next to the road and hoping that somebody will take you somewhere,
anywhere! Just out from this abandoned place...

So,
we were on our way to Quebec city from Montreal, but we only managed to get less than half way there. 5 cars. We ended up in a really kitch place called Madrid. Surreal. Plastic dinosaurs. Smashed cars. Cars with huge tyres. Flags on top of the hotel-restaurant. TV full of monster car shows. Shows.
This is all a big show-off.
But one dinosaur had broken his neck.
It felt little dead.
Is this American dream or what?

Nobody went to Quebec this evening.

We decided to go to a bush. There was a one.
Not much people passing by on this rue Moulin Rouge there.
We fried some bread that we got from the gas station and covered it with superoily peanut butter.
You know, those are the things people can eat when there is not much else to eat. You get your energy at least.
And the Sun went down and we crawled into our sweet tent!

Nature!
Mother Earth!
We realised that out there you are always protected. There is always space! There is peace!
Highway continued roaring,
but the frogs sang it over - they have the spring going on!
Birds.
Small fresh leaves putting their noses out from the Earth.
Yeah,
this was our first night to camp outside in Canada.

It is so easy to start to worry,
but if you have a chance to be out in the Wild, then you are safe! Just have a sleeping bag and a tent and it is all good.

They are saying nowadays that you shouldn't sleep in a bush like this,
but I have to tell you what the Earth whispered to me:

"Thank You guys for being here with me! Nobody has ever slept under my spring birches, here in this "pointless" bush, they say it is not a nice forest... Thank You Children, I am taking care of you always! I miss the touch of the Human-Being. They are in the cars and wearing gloves in these days. I want to feel them! Trust me, touch me, be with me!"

Go to sleep with the Sun and wake up with the Sun - this is the natural cycle, supportive!
And there were horses in my dream, I was riding again! This seems like a faraway dream already for now...

The sky was crying in the next morning,
we went back to the crazy Madrid place,
stayed inside and asked people if the happen to go to Quebec.....hmm... anywhere? Montreal?
For me it felt like it is time to go back to Montreal cause I felt my passport might be there.

So,
in the rain there we were standing,
and showing our wet sign. Montreal was there. White pickup car really stopped and we jumped in! Huh! This guy was talking french and he had 5 children. I guess that was the reason why he stopped :)

Back in the city!
My passport there! 37th floor in a huge business building was our destination. We were waiting in a room 13 for the ambassador. What a view! This is business! And we were just sleeping in the nature and now we are there, in between fancy suits and ties. Contrasts. This is our light~work~way.

This hitchiking trip made us understood that this is Lightwork - that we are standing next to the road and causing some thoughts and feelingsto arise in peoples mind - shame, blame, anger, laughter, memories.. all what comes. And we are offering them a chance to change their everyday patterns, allow something new to come in, something strange, something unexperienced!
Take it,
take us,
the children of the Light.

It is hard for us as well.
But this is what I am here for. I want my children to have the possibility to go to the world without working their asses off and waiting until they have paid off all the loans and children raised up and death in their minds... I want my children to have land to sleep on, dream on and walk on.

Please people!
Just stop for a moment.
Take a breath.
Look around.
Love your neighbour.
Love your partner.
Love the stranger.
Give money to ones who do not have.
Give smiles to those who seem sad and serious.
Look into the eyes of a fellow humans.
Let go of your restrictions and just go and show your love to your dear ones.
Time is passing by, do not wait until you are dead and tired!
Do it now!
Wake up and LIVE!


P.S. Tell everybody that The World Revolution has started, we are in the world!
Join us!
Brake your old habits and patterns!
Love Yourself!

Hallelujah!

Into The Wild

If you should come across with the book or movie called Into the Wild, then I am happy to suggest you to let it become your activity and reality for some moments.
During my travels i have been reading this book. I never finished the book before we gave it as a gift to our canadian friend Dominique, tonight, after watching The Movie. The artistic blend of thoughts, visions, messages, music and sharp reality creates an amazing mood. Kind of a mood where you want to do something. Say something and share something.
Why this movie got so close to me might have something to do with the way i have been on the road. I have not reached Alaska, but the aims and the urge matches often with mine.

While hitchicking in USA in december, I got stuck in the town called Phoenix, Arizona. After a two days of trying to hit the road I surrendered and went to the cinema. After that I was chilling out an reading the book in the parking lot and two guys came by to talk with me while I was zipping my 8 o clock tea and enjoying the wonders of the street lights that made it possible to read.

So the guys saw my big green backpack and the way I was dressed and all this mood around me and started talking about that other guy who went to Alaska and died.
Like that Into The Wild guy.
I sayed yeah, I know about his story. Look , here is the book, I am reading it.
So the guys went like:
"Cool dude. I wish i could help you. hey duuude, here you are, have some money. Ohh shit, I've got one dollar only.. Take it.."

"Thanks!"
I replied and they were gone. The guy who walked into the wild burnt all his money and his college fund savings earned its potential in the charity, but i decided to keep that bill as a booknote.

Soon after that the security came and announced that I am breaking the law, this is private property and I should be gone. I asked them if I could finish my tea before and then go NOwhere -they agreed upon that. What else they could do? Call the cops, like the other day they came to warn me about hitchiking in the dark and dangerous place. :D

So I found a nice spot close to the highway Interstate number 17 and slept well after the adventurous day in the concrete jungle.


The whole idea and feeling about this post is to give you a little charge and initiation to do what you really want to do and share the happiness emerging from it with the beloved ones and all the others who are reachable.



Sander